Wednesday, January 27, 2010
There comes a time in everyone’s life, when they are given an opportunity to turn everything upside down, and inside out. When life breaks off from its course, and you get a chance to start all over again. Everybody gets that chance. But very few notice it.
My name is Pratishtha Durga. I am a wannabe fashion blogger. I say “Wannabe” because my thoughts are too random, my opinions too scattered, and my style, indecisive. I make a couple of posts every couple of months, and then get too busy, doing nothing in general.
Last year, on 6th October, my life turned upside down, and inside out. My ailing mother fell in the bathroom, and lay there, conscious and helpless, for hours… waiting for my father to come back home and rescue her. She suffered a cranial fracture and a hemorrhage that resulted in a month long painful bedridden stage, finally leading to her demise on 15th November. Her right side was paralyzed after the fall, and a week later, she lost her voice. She must have had so much to say, so many more stories to tell. But she died… unable to speak, unable to share, unable to move. She took her stories, her pain, but left behind a gift that all the treasure in the world could not have bought. She left behind a chance for me to change my life.
For months, perhaps years, I have known that I carry around nothing but excess baggage. I spent all my money on meaningless things, most of which I forgot about as soon as I bought them. As the excess baggage in my life grew, my desire to travel started fading away. It’s common wisdom that if you have to travel far, you must travel light. I had a beautiful wardrobe, I had great books, and I had unusual things to decorate my house. And I had mediocrity. No drive, no passion, no desire to find my own stories and travel destinations. I believed I was happy, and I probably was. But then, more things happened that washed away that illusion. And for a while, life felt fruitless, useless.
I realized that nothing hurts more than untold stories and broken promises you made to yourself. Watching my mother’s lifeless body made me wake up to my life all over again. My mother was a story teller. She could weave stars and constellations out of words and take you places you’d never have dreamed existed. And you could see those stars in her eyes. Her lips would curl up in a faint smile and her eyes would well up with the memories of places she had only visited in her thoughts. I want to go to all those places and more. And I want to discover new stories in new places.
I truly believe that you can start your life over gain, whenever you want. That you can make it what you want it to be. It has taken me a while to start defining what I want from my life. What I truly want is to rid my life of the extra baggage I have accumulated over the years, and only hang on to things that I value the most. I want to write my life’s story all over again. And this time, I want my life to fit into just TWO SUITCASES.
And I want to share my story with all of you. And if it can help you dream, if it can help you change the course of your life, I would be twice as happy. From today, as often as I can, I will be writing posts on what I am doing to make my life different. I will try and give shapes to my dreams, and then I will just go ahead and make them come true. And you all will be my partners on this special journey. I would love to hear from you and get help from you in defining my life’s new course. You and I, we will embark on this journey together. Let’s begin!